Well, I have officially stopped teaching the full load and as my classes begin to wind down, I can see the end in sight. I heard student teaching would go by fast and I heard it would be over before I knew it, but I can tell you that the path seems very long on day 1.
The thing is the feeling I have at the end of this is not what I expected. Granted, Monday morning was a little bit easier getting up and know that I would only have to teach half of the classes...but still there was this odd feeling of sadness. I was really going to miss my Spanish 3 who are so smart it's intimidating but so sweet and funny that I felt included immediately. I was even going to miss my Advanced Spanish kids who gave me day after day of headaches, however crazy they are, they have really good hearts. I am really going to miss these kids, a lot.
To be quite honest, I have been lying to people for awhile now, at least to some extent. Whenever people ask me why I want to teach and why I'm in education, I give the standard "I want to change lives..." speech that is ingrained in my brain. But when I started this semester I realized what I fraud I was for saying this, but now, coming to a close, I think I have gained the teachers heart. I mean, I look forward to coming to class know student A will probably laugh at my jokes while student B rolls their eyes at how corny I can be. I design my lessons and activities and even my jokes with my students in mind and that's what makes all this worth it. When a kid who has a 60 average ask "Puedo usar el bano?" and smiles really big when they say it right, that's what makes it worth it. I really do want to change lives and to love these kids.
I keep thinking if they'll ever remember me when I'm gone, but I believe they won't and that's okay, I don't really remember my student teachers (except the way my classmates tortured them). But I hope in some teeny way I left a fingerprint on their hearts, maybe I just stirred up some enjoyment in Spanish or maybe I inspired them, or maybe I was just able to make them laugh. And what they'll never know is how much they have impacted me.
Heck ya-you left a big ole footprint on our hearts!! I remember the first day you were there and even the first couple weeks i hated you and i just wanted my regular teacher back.....now i 100% wish you were still there helping me review for my final exam. Thank you sooooooo much for everything and trust me 3rd period really misses you :)
ReplyDeleteHannah Alfaro from 3rd period Spanish 2